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Trump: Playing the Numbers

More turnover at the White House as Trump plays the numbers with his staff. How long will the new press secretary last?

This past week, it was announced that Stephanie Grisham was stepping down as press secretary; a role she distinguished by not holding a single press briefing. Grisham is being replaced by professional Trump shill Kayleigh McEnany, the only person more annoying than White House Spokesperson Kellyanne Conway.

Given the massive turnover at the White House, pundits have taken to labeling their tenure in terms of past members. Based upon those Facebook puzzles, where random images represent numbers (for example, four footballs and a chicken equals 14), they have placed “bets” on how long new appointees will last based upon the time spent by those who proceeded them.

It sounds confusing, but there is a touch of gallows humor. The tenure of former White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci, "The Mooch," has become the benchmark for shortest time in the White House. His ten-day stint is one no appointee wants to break, therefore, the mathematical equivalent of One Scaramucci is 10.

Prior to that, former National Security Advisor Michael Flynn held the record for shortest tenure. His 24 day time in the White House looked like something that could not be equaled, yet the incompetence of this administration has proved is wrong, yet again.

Maybe this is what Trump meant by “winning”?

Remember, after the election, when Trump promised to bring "only the best" people to his administration?

Anyway, as one-by-one, more members of the administration fell by the wayside, pundits came up with a way of calculating the amount of time new appointees would spend in their respective jobs. Using this formula, four Scaramuccis and a Flynn would equal 64 days in their position.

Others held a longer tenure. Sean Spicer lasted seven months as White House press secretary. His departure was met with both relief and disappointment, as Melissa McCarthy perfected a Sean Spicer parody on Saturday Night Live. Given the short tenure many have spent at their positions, lasting Two Spicers, or 14 months, would indeed be an accomplishment.

Alt-right leader Steve Bannon edges out Spicer by a month. He held the position of White House strategist for eight months. Lasting Two Bannons and a Spicer, or 23 months, would be equivalent to a lifetime appointment.

Yet there are those who have defied this White House turmoil. One is White House Spokesperson Kellyanne Conway. While her title is White House spokesperson, she could also be labeled the Secretary of Alternative Facts. She became the face of the first presidential lie of this administration as she coined that term to explain the discrepancy in their numbers versus the actual numbers of those who attended Trump’s inauguration.

A successor to Steve Bannon’s alt-right views is Stephen Miller. While his title is White House advisor, he could easily be labeled Secretary of White Supremacy, as his anti-immigration policies led to the concentration camp style detention centers that separates families and will be a legacy of the Trump administration.

Whatever the number, we can only hope one number becomes a reality. That would be that One Trump equals Four Years.

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