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Trump's Coronavirus Easter Parade



President Trump, tired of all of this social distancing stuff and his precious stock market tanking, wants to be able to lead a happy Easter parade through the cherry blossoms in Washington, DC.



He envisions ladies in their finest spring outfits and sporting the most fashionable bonnets parading through the city, with finely dressed gentlemen on their arms.


Official Trump Easter Egg

He pictures excited little children scurrying around the White House lawn during the annual Easter egg hunt, as they search for fake gold eggs imprinted with Trump's picture.


Down the street and across the land churches will be packed with joyous people as they celebrate Easter and all that it represents. Hearts will be filled with the many blessings that this season has to offer. Voices will lift, songs will soar as church bells ring.


And then, when services are done, we can all rush out to our favorite restaurant for a wonderful family Easter dinner.


All worries of something as horrible as the coronavirus will have melted away, as businesses will have opened, people will be back to work and school. Stores and restaurants will once again be packed, and in taverns across the nation people will offer a toast to Trump for having magically willed away what he has called "the scourge" of this invisible enemy.


All of that will happen, of course, if only we just stop all of this social distancing nonsense, all of these practices of isolating ourselves in our homes, of the horrible inconvenience of standing at least six feet away from the closest person. And, of course, if we all go back to work.


No problem, those people who are gasping for breath because the hospitals and medical centers don't have enough ventilators to keep them alive. They're old anyway, or they already were going to die of something else. Just park those bodies into the corner and get down to business.


We haven't even completed Trump's 15-day period of social distancing, but he's decided we've had enough of this inconvenience. Time to open things up and get "raring to go." Screw all this other stuff.


No problem, those healthcare workers, the doctors and nurses and technicians who leave their own families every day and rush toward the danger of caring for COVID-19 patients without proper protective equipment. No worries! They'll be fine.


Forget about all those worrisome scientists like Dr. Anthony Fauci who urge caution, who warn that if Trump's Easter fantasy is fulfilled many people could die. They're just a bunch of worrywarts, anyway. Who needs scientists?


And pay no attention to those who say Trump is choosing a healthy economy over human life. How could they even think that? They're exaggerating the situation and have no guts. Most of them are Democrats anyway, who used this Wuhan Flu thing to bring the economy to a standstill just so they could destroy Trump. So forget about them.


So be happy because there's a bright side to all of this. With this $2 trillion "recovery" bill being passed by Congress, we'll all have more money in our pockets so we can have an extra happy Easter.


Just think, we can go shopping. Buy some new outfits. Or maybe something really cool. Me? I Think I'll plan a nice vacation -- maybe a cruise.


Spring is here! Easter's coming! So, let's celebrate! Let's get ready for Trump's big parade.







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